Where Have You Been Lately?

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Heaven

I went to IHOP (International House Of Prayer) on 3/12/2011 and wrote this:


     Believing in God and knowing he's real is such a beautiful thing. The believers dance with such love in their hearts. God must be surrounded with beauty and devotion and angels dancing with ribbons of colour. I can't help but to stare, gazing in awe, thinking to myself that someday He will choose me to live in such art where He. The music, music of praise that forces me to my feet involuntarily is the same music that must be in that glorious place where God sits in his thrown. In the midst of this intensity I can't help but to want to call out to God and speak to him and thirst for his word. I don't think getting saved was a coincidence at all. God chose me. I finally realize God has never left me of forsaken me but I was the one who strayed away from him and I know that leaving him to drawn in my own sins again isn't even an option. This time, this new love that's drawing me near His love will never fade away. I'm making a vow to God right now that I shall love him with all of my heart and spirit, body, mind and soul. He's opened my eyes and though I regret the fact that it's taken me till near the end, in a time when the Earth itself groans for the return of Jesus to realize just how much he loves me.
     All my life I've wanted to fill in the void inside me with everything other than God's love. I had life all wrong. I desired materials that won't follow me when I'm dead. It's fascinating how I do things I didn't have in me to do before; Like praying, lifting my hands before Him, comprehending messages and being overwhelmed with his presence without backing down from fear. I realize who's child I am now. I chose to follow God and to be a daughter of God.


...I pray to be only yours.


Yours truly
    Chelly M. Gray

Love?

     Everyone always asks me "Why are you in a relationship if you don't believe in love?". I tell them two answers. 

1. He doesn't believe in love either.
2. I believe that maybe if you take a negative & another negative it might create a positive. 

     My past isn't the greatest and I can accept that.... However, a bad past does take a toll in effecting your future. I've moved around a lot and I've seen people come and go at a young age, so I don't get attached. My significant other of 6 months is the same way but he just moved back to Iowa and I'm taking it really hard. I had my share of tears, and I find it hard to stop crying which is unusual b/c I don't weep for anyone other than myself... not even for my family. My appetite has changed and I really just want to be in solitude. 

     I've heard of all the side effects that happen to people but I thought it was only exaggerations. I can't stop thinking about him & it's sad really. Everything I look at reminds me of him or of something he said. I don't even believe in love and I'm going through the motions. I sometimes turn the picture frame with a photo of us face down to avoid crying... He surprised me with it on Valentine's Day with a box of chocolate. 

     So do I believe now? I can't say yes or no because I simply don't know anymore. 

Chubby People In Skinny Jeans

     Skinny jeans have been "the cool pants" since the 80's BUT came back in style whenever those cute Jonas Brothers rose to fame. After seeing trendy teen pop sensations rockin' the look with their chicken legs; everyone wanted to squeeze into a pair.
     So what size do skinny jeans stop at? Well, its all in the name SKINNY jeans. Earlier today when speaking to a good friend of mine I asked "Whats your fashion pet peave?" her response was "I can't stand when chubby people wear skinny jeans, I don't get it".  

Well here are some of my theories:

1. Skinny jeans were made for skinny people.
2. Skinny jeans create an illusion that makes chubby people appear to be skinny(er).

     In conculsion, wear whatever makes you feel confident & comfortable. If skinny jeans make a chubby person feel like a Victoria Secret model so be it!

2010 (What a Stupid Year)

     What the hell happened in 2010 anyway? There was no media buzz or anything nationwide to gossip about. No celebrities shaved their heads and no ordinary bussiness man committed a tragic suicide (well not that I've heard of). For a while I started to think maybe it's because I moved from California all the way to Kansas, and that Kansas wasn't as "Hip & Trendy" but even that wasn't the case.
     Everytime someone txted me I'd say "Hey :D how was your Christmas!!!" and everytime, the majority said "It just felt like another day". What's sad is that about 3 people blamed it on "aging", We're teenagers for crying out loud!
     Well to sum things up, there's only 3 days left of 2010, after that it's a brand new year. Unfortunately sometimes problems do tend to stalk people into the next year, but if 2010 just wasn't a year for you, please don't let *2011* be the same!

The Intellegent Phone

Last night while I was peacefully eating some oreos My nephew comes in with a Blackberry Storm2 telling me how Mandy (his mom/my sister) accidentally broke her regular storm. So Mandy went to the Verizon store to get a new one and they were out of regular storms so they gave her the Storm2. Then the conversation got crazy and he's stared saying things like..."I'ts more than a smart phone. They should call it THE INTELLEGENT PHONE". I had this shocked look, shook my head and said oh no!. What striked me the most was that he told ME... "who are you talking to? Shut up Chelly". if anything I should've been the one telling him to Shut Up!